Tuesday, May 15, 2018
Sunday, April 01, 2018
The following is my annual Easter re-post.
Every so often, a reader tells me their impression of something I wrote in a way that deepens my own understanding of my own words. Someone in Florida once told me how a decision one of my characters made helped her illustrate a sentiment she'd been trying to get across to her friends.
Here's what she told me:
In the past, I've had to help friends realize that life goes on even after you've made a poor decision. Not because you move on or get over it, but because you grow as a result of it. You build something new, something with a higher purpose, using what you've learned as one of your bricks.
When I read that, my heart leapt! Since there was no way I could say it any better, I immediately knew I'd be using her words in future speeches...and blog posts.
So what does this have to do with Easter?
One of the most beautiful ideas surrounding this holiday is that we're all given an opportunity to make corrections if we find ourselves traveling down a road we don't want to - or shouldn't - be on. In fact, we're given this opportunity to change every day. Every second! But sometimes we need a calendar to remind us.
Refresh. Repair. Rebirth. Whatever you want to call it...
Renewal is a wonderful blessing!
Wednesday, March 28, 2018
One of the greatest benefits of writing Thirteen Reasons Why is the platform it gave me to speak out against bullying and stand up for victims of harassment. This is why recent allegations against me have hurt so much, and I want you to know the truth.
While I was married, I had consensual affairs with a number of women that did not end positively and I apologized for my part in the distress. The affairs were selfish, hurtful, and deeply damaged my family. I confessed this to my wife years ago, have been in counseling, and can never apologize enough to my family for the pain I caused.
But no part of this was harassment. I did not touch anyone without their permission, never offered or hinted at professional quid pro quo, and did not retaliate in any way after the affairs ended.
Last year, in an anonymous email to the Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators, some of the women disclosed my affairs. They acknowledged their responsibility, saying: “We do realize that we played a role in our relationships with him and that we are responsible as well.”
To avoid uncomfortable situations with those behind the email, I suggested to SCBWI that I not attend their conferences—even though all extramarital relationships that began at their events began before I was published. The executive director responded via email that this should be “just a break for some breathing room.” Months later, she noticed I let my membership lapse and advised me to renew it, so I did.
I will continue to work on improving myself as a person so that my message against harassment will not be hindered, and for my family most of all.
Thank you for reading this.
— Jay Asher